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Support group growing for gay, lesbian community
By Shruti Daté Singh Daily Herald Staff Writer
Posted February 02, 2004

When Deb Hale decided to come out of the closet four years ago, the Palatine resident knew not a single soul in the gay or lesbian communities.

Alone, she wrestled with accepting herself while worrying about losing the support of her family and friends.

Hale didn't know who she could lean on during this time, except for groups helping gays and lesbians in Chicago.

So last September, Hale and her partner, Dixie LoCicero, established a chapter of the Parents, Families and Friends of Gays and Lesbians in Palatine.

PFLAG, a national organization established about 30 years ago, provides support to gays and lesbians, and their family members and friends. It also provides education and advocacy.

"We realized that there is very little support for the (gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered) community here in the Northwest suburbs," Hale said.

Driving to the city to tap services is an inconvenient option for people living roughly 30 miles away, she said.

For example, Cook County established a domestic partner registry last year, but gay and lesbian couples can't register at the Cook County Circuit Courthouse in Rolling Meadows and instead must go to Chicago.

County officials said that since the registry opened in October, about 330 couples have signed up. Hale and LoCicero plan to sign up but haven't been able to take the time.

PFLAG provides at least one safe place to find resources and seek advice close to home, she said. The Northwest suburban chapter reaches into Arlington Heights, Barrington, Buffalo Grove, Des Plaines, Elk Grove Village, Hoffman Estates, Kildeer, Mount Prospect, Palatine, Rolling Meadows and Schaumburg.

The group holds monthly discussion meetings in the Palatine Public Library. In February only, though, the meeting will be in the Countryside Unitarian Universalist Church in Palatine.

On average, about 20 people attend each meeting, and the number of people calling for information keeps growing, Hale said.

"A very common theme is they are so excited that there is finally something here in the Northwest suburbs," Hale said.

Along with the monthly meetings, the group hopes to participate in community parades and festivals this summer.

Hale said she knows some residents might be surprised this chapter has emerged in Palatine because they are not aware of the gay and lesbian community in the area.

"A lot of people remain hidden ... in the closet ... because of the very real danger," Hale said. To come out could mean losing your job, home, friends, family and place of worship, as well as facing physical danger.

Suburbanites often assume gays and lesbians are confined mostly to Chicago and the Lakeview neighborhood, where the Gay and Lesbian Pride Parade is held every year.